adilahalim,

True Story .

2012-02-09T22:05:00.000-08:00

i woke up the next morning
with a smile on my face
and a long list of gentlemen
happy to take your place
less trashier, much classier
then who you proved to be
how longs it gonna take before
you see that she's no me

i knew better
than to let you break my heart
this soul you'll never see again
won't be showing scars.

2012-02-08T10:01:00.000-08:00

untuk awak yang dekat sarawak tu,

jangan ingat saya tak tahu awak stalk saya.

terang-terangan sangat kot.

tak mengapalah.

saya dah buang semuanya.

rantai awak, cincin, peh, semua lah senang cerita.

btw, saya nak inform awak ni.

saya beli BB tu bukan sebab awak,

sebab saya penat bergantung dekat awak,

dan saya sakit bila awak mengungkit semua benda.

jadi,

saya memang perempuan tak tahu malu yang awak sebut dalam facebook tu.

semoga awak ceria selalu.

eceh, nampak sangat tipu saya wish awak macam tu.

sebab saya masih ingat,

kuat mana tangan awak dekat badan saya.

saya pernah cakap,

sakit kena tumbuk tak sama macam sakit hati, tahu ?

insya-Allah, one day saya akan lupa jugak benda bodoh ni.

tapi, buat sementara waktu ni,

biar lah saya lawan sakit ni sorang-sorang.

saya kuat lah, jangan risau :')

Amin.

2012-02-08T09:52:00.001-08:00

Ya Allah,
Andai dia bukan untuk ku,
Andai dia bukan jodohku,
Maka berilah ganti yang lebih baik buatnya,
Berikanlah dia insan yang benar benar terbaik buat kehidupannya,
Insan yang benar-benar mampu memimpinnya ke syurga-Mu,
Dan bantulah aku untuk memperbaiki diriku,
Agar aku kukuh dalam mencari cinta-Mu.

2012-02-06T12:13:00.001-08:00

never, EVER.

2012-02-06T11:41:00.001-08:00

platonic love.

mcm siye.

happened once, ain't going to happen again.

never, EVER.

2012-02-04T17:34:00.001-08:00

ade pet baru, nama die curve. ok bai.

2012-02-01T19:26:00.000-08:00

sudah fikir.

sudah capai keputusan.

mahu gembira.

mahu lupa semua benda.

mahu jadi macam biasa.

baru hidup jadi aman sentosa.

perghhh ayat aman sentosa gilaaa skemaaa. HAHA

huihh, saye tak sabar mahu tunggu hujung minggu ni,

saye ade event utk kawan baik dan event mencari pengganti gadget kesayangan saye.

hewhewhew itu pun kalau ade rezeki la kan, ehehe ^_____^

2012-02-01T13:49:00.000-08:00

tak boleh berhenti dari berputar-putar atas paksi yang sama.

sakit, pedih, dan rasa macam haram semua ada.

cukup, penuh caca-marba.

hanya satu yang aku minta,

aku minta supaya aku dapat lupakan semuanya.

when you are busted at my new friend's house at four in the morning,

2012-02-01T13:14:00.001-08:00

i just want to tell -- may force be with you.

am done explaining.

2012-01-31T11:54:00.000-08:00

got myself a new heart.

got myself a new life.

got myself new friends.

and i finally got myself back.

2012-01-30T09:20:00.000-08:00

pernah bodoh kerana terlalu cepat percaya.

pernah bodoh kerana terlalu cepat suka.

pernah bodoh kerana terlalu cepat berburuk sangka.

pernah bodoh kerana, terlalu cinta.

2012-01-30T09:16:00.000-08:00

dan setelah sekalian kalinya aku mencuba,

aku masih gagal.

2012-01-29T18:08:00.000-08:00

i dreamt of you, my almost lover.

i saw you in the glimpse of a bright light.

so pure, so warm.

you came, you smile and you kiss me on the forehead,

and i woke up crying for the thousand time.

2012-01-29T08:53:00.000-08:00

aku akan bangkit.

you just need to wait.

Perihal Bukan Sekarang.

2012-01-25T23:17:00.001-08:00

Aku tak boleh mengarang sekarang.
Bukan sekarang.
Sekarang keadaan aku sangat teruk.
Amarah aku dilepaskan, nafsu aku diterajangkan,
Perbuatan aku ditelanjangkan, perkataan aku diputarbelitkan,
Ah.
Dunia.
Sampai bila pun kita di bawah, akan ada satu masa yang kita akan naik juga.
Oleh itu,
Tunggu.
Tunggu aku.
Aku akan pastikan aku sampai ke puncak itu.
Bukan untuk beri kau bahan untuk umpatan,
Tapi untuk fasa pemulihan.
Untuk aku.
Untuk aku.
Semuanya untuk aku.
Setelah segalanya, aku berikan pada kau.

Perihal Takkan Habis,

2012-01-25T23:08:00.001-08:00

Kau pukul aku.
Aku pukul kau.
Habis.

Kau tengking aku.
Aku tengking kau.
Habis.

Kau maki aku.
Aku maki kau.
Malangnya,
Kali ini,
Ia tak akan habis.

Parut badan boleh hilang.
Dengan sedikit bantuan perubatan.

Sekarang,
Beri aku ubat untuk hilangkan parut di hati.

Tiada.
Kau akan kata, tak ada ubatnya untuk parut jenis itu.

Dan aku, hanya akan tersenyum.
Dan melangkah pergi.

Wavy, Pftt.

2012-01-23T06:59:00.000-08:00

dari ini,

jadi macam ni.

i was bored.

found my sister's curling iron so i gave it a try.

tralala.

nuff said.

k bai.

2012-01-15T19:17:00.000-08:00

ok fine aku tau aku lambat.

tapi sebab aku takde internet,

ini lah jadinye.

ekeke.

lambat pun lambat lah,

happy birthday temok.

hihi.

ily muah muah girlfreng.

*sweet enn ?! sweet en ?!*

>_____<

2012-01-10T05:41:00.000-08:00

sad. but true.

Misi Sebelum 2012 !

2011-12-31T02:05:00.000-08:00

untuk roommate tersayang :)

*sayang kew ? sayang lewww. HAHA :p

comel tak ? comel takkkk ?!
hahahaha.

okay since aku dah sweet bagai ni, cepat ajar aku costing.
mueheheh n___n

*abaikan je la muka yang dah double gemok tu. haihh -___-''

New.

2011-12-27T10:37:00.000-08:00

I came to win, to fight, to conquer, to thrive
I came to win, to survive, to prosper, to rise.

you know, the feeling of being abandoned after making a silly mistake is really inevitable. i feel so small. compared to those who happened to have it all. and i am NOT referring to wealth or anything materialistic. and referring to those who actually have REAL friends and real relationship to begin with. the love, the support, the warmth, the comfort, the ups and downs. so many things that i am envious with. i don't have it much, i just have him to spill my guts out. I'm not saying that i regret it, it's just, sometimes, i really miss my girls. the juicy gossip flowing out like red ocean and the fun we had in the car, or even when we hit the malls. sometimes, i wish i could turn back the time and stay at that particular moment, forever.

but Allah loves me more than anything else. Allah took the people that i don't need in my life and replaced it with someone better. though i can't tell who she/he is, but i know deep down, i've always known that i've learn my lesson and now, no matter how shitty life can be, i know where to turn to. Allah knows me best. Allah defines me best. Allah loves me best. and i regret the fact that only now is the moment where i realize all that. i could take forever but hey, i didn't.

and for that, alhamdulillah.

Fake.

2011-12-02T09:53:00.000-08:00

hell yeah.

gonna go with the flow .

2011-11-28T11:29:00.000-08:00

bismillah.

minggu kedua dalam semester ke-empat.

permulaan yang agak goyah.

tapi tak mengapa,

biar dia dengan hidup dia.

dan aku dengan hidup aku.

alhamdulillah.

tadi dah periksa semua jadual kelas, insya-Allah tak ada masalah.

tak payah drop apa-apa. semua boleh ambil.

dan aku memang bersyukur sangat-sangat tentang tu.

dan walaupun aku ternampak orang yang aku tak perlu nampak tadi,

tapi nasib hati ni macam dah kebal.

nampak si perempuan tu ketika semua orang kalut nak tengok jadual kelas,

tapi hati ni ?

hati ni alhamdulillah tak buat ragam.

tak sakit sangat, tak suka sangat.

semuanya biasa-biasa.

dah tak ada perasaan.

agaknya, aku dah berjaya buang semua ingatan dan perasaan. sekarang aku biasa. walaupun kawan baik dia dah kena dismissed (based from what people tell me lah kan, dunno if it's true or not), tapi nak buat macam mana kan ? dah tak ada rezeki dia dalam uitm. dan aku bersyukur actually, sebab tak akan ada drama lagi yang akan timbul. like i said, biar dia dengan hidup dia. sebab aku sendiri sibuk dengan hidup aku.

Tuhan nak tunjuk banyak benda. salah satu adalah mereka berdua.

so now ? i'm gratefully happy. i know i'm gonna see her-cum-face in the class, but heck. i'll do whatever best to protect my own happiness and my own dignity. back then i was kinda hoping that she'll try to protect our dignity together, but seeing that she's the one who spread the whole story bout me, i have to rest my case and put an end to this. i won't go and talk crap about how i'm hurt and stuff like that anymore because eventually, i know what's right and what's not. and time do flies. alhamdulillah i'm healed. i don't take her as my 'used-to-be-close-friend' anymore, but i regard her as some anonymous girl that i have no business with.

deep down i still feel the humiliation because i used to call her as my best friend back then, but she doesn't see me that way. maybe i'm the one with a sensitive heart, but well, can't help it. sorry that i didn't make it to your top best friend list. i have no wealth to offer you, i have no blackberry && iphone 4 for you to borrow just to go online. i don't have all the money to support you all the time. hah. i'm being sap, again.

excuse me. babbling bout this can make me write for hours. but the output is very little. you know little ?? haih. i need to cheer up, like really. enough with this friendship mess. i have faith in the truth and nothing but the truth. so i need to held my head up and look beyondddd !

okay, gotta go and enjoy the night. err i mean morning. nasib baik esok kelas start pukuii doblas ! hepi bakhangg. haha.

ps : dear readers, sorry for all the bitter post before this. i personally want to put an end to this too ! so please, bear with it, kay ? even if you can't, you still have to. miahahaha. k bai :)

Untuk Semua Yang Berjalan Lancar,

2011-11-04T01:44:00.000-07:00

alhamdulillah :)

Perihal Perit dan Pahit.

2011-11-01T11:20:00.000-07:00

It’s nothing new.

It’s the same story, twisted than ever.

I’m not going to say anything.

I thought we are all -- big girls.

I thought we are all -- matured.

But I guess I’m wrong.

Handling the drama is quite burdensome.

I thought by closing the old book, would make me or perhaps us; back to normal.

But I guess I am just another shallow girl who would

actually believe that everything is going to be just fine.

Even though they are not, at some point.

I would love to take these (too many negative stories) -- as a reminder.

A reminder of what a real friend could be.

A reminder of what a fake person could be.

A reminder of what a backstabbing friend could be.

A reminder of what a wealthy but bimbo person could possibly be.

I must admit; by now, I feel so vulnerable.

With these backstabbing friend that I have all around me (LF&RRR),

I could possibly die with shame.

I merely do whatever I think is best,

But I guess my level of standard didn’t meet their level of standard.

I admit, I was wrong when I am too (over too close) with my boyfriend when I’m in front of you guys. But that’s just it. I’m sorry if I ever offend fat / big people like her or cute little dwarf like her for pointing out that they couldn’t even score a date, but hey, eventually people will fall in love and get married, right ? Well, in this obnoxious brain of mine, I do think that way. I might appear to be the bad guy in the story just because I have a boyfriend.

Like seriously, if having boyfriend and be close to him is a bad thing, then hear this – I’m proud for having a boyfriend. I’m proud for him being so close and intimate to me. I’m proud that when I go out, he is there ALL the way to accompany me. I’m proud that I AM HIS. I am no promiscuous girl; I don’t date different peoples in a couple of months. I don’t date the person I met online. I don’t date the person who only knows me by my fake fair pictures that I have uploaded online. I am nothing like that. I knew a person, who became a good friend of mine, who understands me, who believes in me when others wouldn’t, who backs me up for no concrete reason, the person who would actually chose me over football, and that is him. And if being intimate with him is a wrong doing; then let it be.

Don’t talk from the Islamic views with me. The person who accused me should have known by now that they must have at least four witnesses to accuse me doing such thing. But is there any? No? And if I am not mistaken, she confessed that she has the dark side as well and that they were all part of her past. Did I make a big fuss out of it? No! I believe that everybody has a chance to repent. And for her bff, are you by the way, are better than me? To accuse me such thing? Do you? Did you cover all your aurah, before you judge me? No? I rather not answer that question. Because we all know, we are not perfect, thus before judging others, you must judge yourself.

For that accusation, the one that says I’m no longer a virgin; well, I couldn’t care less for now. I feel like they are out of ideas to poke me and trying to provoke me with all their might. It’s my prerogative to have what kind of relationship that I want with my boyfriend. I’ve learned my lesson the hard way. And it is purely about a friend, a good friend of mine, who knows me better than anyone else, can definitely turn her back and stab me alive. It hurts so bad, I think I will never ever get over it.

Yet, I have asked for her forgiveness, and she said she’s sorry as well. But I did mention that we could never be good friends, just like what we used to. There will be no more sleeping over, there will be no lunch together, or whatever it is, there will be no more us. I’m bitter about this, yes. I do miss the four of us, yes. But what she did was beyond that. I am … honest to God, hurt.

It hurts so bad, to see how people can change in a split of second.

------------------------------------------------------

Sudah lah.

Aku pun dah penat.

Kau nak ada kawan baru, terpulang. Aku tak pernah halang.

Dulu bila kau gaduh dengan aku, kau carik beby, kau carik alin.

Now kau dah gaduh dengan semua orang, kau carik orang lain.

Tak apa, itu semua dunia kau.

Aku tak kesah langsung, apa orang nak kata.

Tapi aku terkesan, dalam hati,

mungkin sebab kau pernah kenal aku, rapat dengan aku.

Haha. Kelakar lah semua benda ni.

Takpe lah. Aku tengah belajar ni.

Slow-slow belajar yang perangai kau memang macam tu.

Dan aku terpaksa terima.

Walaupun kena tahan rasa perit dan pahit yang menggila.

Talent.

2011-10-02T16:08:00.000-07:00

meet Dev.
she's amazing :)

Lies.

2011-09-21T07:14:00.000-07:00

super true.

but i would like to twist it a bit.

it goes something a little like this :

friends or no friends,

lies are still lies.

2011-09-07T10:43:00.000-07:00

Friends.

2011-07-24T07:32:00.000-07:00

i'm feeling a little bit nostalgic tonight. dunno why. maybe the consecutive shots of fun that i'm having these past few days made me a bit vulnerable on the inside.

like this one, sigh.

it's pretty obvious that i miss you guys a lot.

and the fact that we're getting older really does change

the fact that we're not that close anymore.

okay ayat pusing pusing sila pening sekarang

-___-''

but well, i didn't blame anyone in this particular matter.

it's a standard procedure where everyone changed to adapt with the environment.

especially a new one.

and i know after the college thing is over,

we might not be so close anymore,

but, seeing this -

i know that i will always keep you guys close - to my heart.

Bieber Rage.

2011-07-09T10:39:00.000-07:00

3 guys walk into a bar

The first guy says "I have got the smallest arm in the world"

The second guy "I have the smallest head in the world"

The third guy "I have got the smallest dick in the world"

The 3 guys go to the Guinness World Records

The first guy comes back and says

"I really do have the smallest arm in the world"

The second guy comes back and says

"Amazing, I do have the smallest head in the world"

The third guy comes back angry

" WHO THE HELL IS JUSTIN BIEBER ?!! "

NotaKaki :

found this random comment on youtube.

i LOL'ed so hard on this one.

can't stop to copy and paste it here.

bahahahahahahahaha.

poor kid tho.

Funeral.

2011-07-05T05:43:00.000-07:00

beautifully imperfect.

how manis is that ai tell you ? :')

2ne1 - Lonely .

2011-06-27T09:59:00.000-07:00

the lyrics stabbed me.

from the front, the back and even from the side.

how come they know every single thing that slips through my mind ?

this is insane.

i'm sleeping in with my earphone tonight.

it's a preventive method i must say.

in case my tears roll down uncontrollably,

so damn uncontrollably.

T__T

don't want this panda eyes to pop out tomorrow.

sigh.

welcome back, miserable life.

how i long you, not.

oh and hey,

please be nice.

Kepala, Batu.

2011-06-26T20:27:00.000-07:00

kepala wa memang carik pasal.

masa-masa wa tak ada mood lah dia nak bikin hal.

sakit die pergh.

nak mengadap matahari memang tak ah.

boleh pitam kot.

okay fine.

ini bukan alasan nak dapat mc.

sial lah.

sakit lah gilaaaa gilaaa gilaa (gema)

eii meluat laa kepala buat hal macam ni.

jumpa doctor satgi nak mintak synflex satu beg besar !

bila sakit kepala lagi, terus telan semua !

-____-''

Konflik Dalaman.

2011-06-26T08:07:00.000-07:00

maaf lah, tapi sekarang aku dah rasa tak selamat

nak update apa-apa status tentang hati dan perasaan di facebook.

tapi itu bukan alasan untuk aku hamburkan amarah aku pada orang dekat blog ni.

by the way, aku sayang blog ni.

sayaang gila.

sebab tu walaupun semangat nak menulis tu dah kurang, tak mengapa.

janji aku tahu aku ada tempat untuk cerita.

cerita yang orang lain bukan nya kesah sangat pun.

little details yang bagi aku penting, tapi haram tak penting langsung pada orang lain.

yang di tulis, sentiasa sama apa yang aku rasa.

tapi intepretasi yang berbeza bagi manusia di luar sana.

tak mengapa.

aku suka diversiti itu.

sebab sepuluh otak tak boleh berfikir seperti satu.

jahanam tak berkembang ah kalau jadi macam tu.

fak.

walaupun aku tahu aku agak mengarut di sini,

still aku nak teruskan jugak.

sebab aku dah lamaaa gila tak buat entri sedih atau emo wehh.

oh ya, anda sedar ke tak yang ini adalah satu entri emo ?!?

okay fine. mungkin tak berapa nak emo.

tapi rasanya, bagi anda yang tinggi nilai pemerhatiannya,

akan perasan,

bahawasanya saya,

nur adilah abdull halim,

ada konflik personaliti.

fak.

malam ni tidur berendam air mata lagi lah gamaknya.

Kosong, Sangat .

2011-06-26T04:34:00.001-07:00

aku dah tak tau nak cakap apa.

aku dah lama tak menulis dalam keadaan yang down.

rasa macam lama sangat tak buat entri sedih.

ha ha bangang.

banyak benda yang buat aku pedih.

tapi aku rasa aku lagi kuat,

tahan semua dalam-dalam.

sebab malas nak layan.

aku dah terbiasa,

kalau tak suka, diam saja.

balik bilik, membebel dengan nisa.

mana ada nak call mama cerita-cerita.

ada lah, tapi kadang-kadang.

dulu,

setiap kali balik sekolah mesti makan dengan mama.

teman Iqqi, teman Imran.

buat kerja sekolah, makan tengahari,

terbongkang depan tv, tidur, tidur dan tidur lagi.

lepas tu teman mama tengok channel TLC.

haih.

saiko : jangan nangis lala. jangan nangis. tunggu masa ada pinggan lebih, kau baling je kat dinding. tak pun, kau hentak kepala kuat-kuat. oh oh paling koman pun, kau bukak je lah lagu emo screamo paling kuat dekat earphone. okay paling afdal, ambil wuduk dan pi solat.

okay bai.

The Holiday :)

2011-06-23T05:18:00.000-07:00

FIRST OF ALL :

you guys must watch this movie.

absolutely a MUST.

it's not even a new film dammit.

released back in 2006 and i only had the chance to watch it in 2011.

i am soo outdated.

oh and !

this hunk is a lovely creature to stare at.

eventho it might seems lunatic to stare at his picture all day long,

but hey, i just did

-____-''

why on earth are you so sweet in the movie ?

*i don't know outside the movie, but whatdehayl.

watch the movie first, people.

later then you can go drool over his sweetness in this movie.

^____^

ada cerita .

2011-06-13T03:16:00.000-07:00

ada cerita yang nak dicerita,

tapi mungkin, baik simpan dalam kepala.

kerana tak semua yang singgah sini suka kita.

tunggu lah.

ada waktu yang sesuai,

aku akan cerita juga :)

Comeback.

2011-05-28T04:36:00.000-07:00

making an entrance in Merbok.

ehem.

btw, say hello to my new room. kinda like it.

has all the things that i need.

phew guess new college wasn't that bad huh ?

well let's just hope that my room will stay neat and tidy all the way through the semester.

(which i highly doubt it)

later on i'll post my room's picture.

gotta go and unpack my stuff.

and yep, tomorrow's class start at 8 AM.

-______-''

as my mom said, the early bird gets the worm.

but what happened to the worm ?

i say - the early worms are eaten by the early birds.

and it happen to change to a little bit like this --

the late worms are not going to be eaten by the early birds.

see ?

now i wish i am that worm, dammit.

Exhausted .

2011-05-22T03:55:00.000-07:00

i did some blogwalking and believe it or not, i was kinda disgusted by some of the blogs that i've visited. a mental note has definitely been taken because i don't want to come across that blog anymore. i don't mind the ideas that is written on the blog, but somehow, the usage of the language, the font and those extra tidbits that you usually put on the sidebar of the blog makes me feel weird and cheesy.

don't mind me though. it's just a thought by the way. i can't expect people to write or behave the way that i want. that is lunatic. and totally not cool. so imma gonna let it flow.

urgh. i am freaking tired due to all the workload that i've done with my dad. am getting more muscle lah this time, nak macho punya pasal. LOL. and my level of crankiness also shows with the update of this blog. it's f.king obvious.

ok bai.

Malaun Terhebat.

2011-05-21T00:29:00.000-07:00

aku rasa lain macam sebenarnya. dah masuk kali ketiga aku update blog dalam masa satu hari. dan lagi menyedihkan, dalam masa setengah jam. aku tak tau kenapa aku macam sangap nak menulis. kenapa aa ? aku rasa macam dah hilang setengah dari aku bila dah kurang layan k-pop, tapi bila tak menulis, aku rasa benda yang sama. adakah kini aku sudah kosong ?

mungkin ini ada kaitan dengan pengajaran di bawah kot, bahawasanya memang tak semua yang kita nak, kita akan dapat.

sebab --

mesti ada je malaun yang tak puas hati dengan apa yang kau buat atau nak. maka di sabotaj nya hasrat kau tu sampai terbantut keinginan kau nak makan, beli atau buat apa saja. maka aku boleh klasifikasi kan malaun-malaun ini sebagai malaun terhebat. terhebat bukan sebab apa, dia ada kelebihan yang boleh bagi orang lain sakit jiwa sebab dia. hebat bukan ?

*kalau aku afdlin shauki, dah lama aku letak tangan di dada dan pandang ke atas. LOL

Pengajaran Satu.

2011-05-21T00:23:00.000-07:00

tak semua benda yang kita nak, kita akan dapat.

kecuali kalau kau anak orang kaya yang sentiasa dilimpahi dengan kesenangan dunia ni, then apa yang kau nak, akan sentiasa dapat -- dari aspek material okay. bukan hati dan perasaan.

Gadis Jinjang -- Tak Berapa Nak Happy.

2011-05-21T00:19:00.000-07:00

hari ni semua orang tengok aku macam nak lempang orang.
salah, hari ni aku rasa macam nak lempang semua orang.

ada kot perbezaan kat situ.

entah pegi mana gadis jinjang yang happy tu entah.

dah kena campak lombong agaknya.

oh dan, er hai. saya adalah gadis jinjang yang tak berapa nak happy sekarang ni. sorry lah permulaan pengenalan saya agak mengarut, tapi saya -- gadis jinjang tak berapa nak happy ni akan sentiasa ada dekat blog ini, rasanya lah. tengok mood tuan punya blog. tapi saya ada firasat yang kuat yang mengatakan mood tuan saya akan tak elok untuk seketika ini. tapi, anda jangan risau. gadis jinjang tak berapa nak happy ini janji takkan update blog dengan cerita-cerita emo.

er kalau emo pun, akan ditapis dan akan disesuaikan mengikut situasi.

ok bai.

Gadis Jinjang Kembali.

2011-05-18T00:07:00.000-07:00

hello. saya telah kembali kepada perempuan yang tidak tetap emosinya. haha. kelakar. saya rasa macam nak gelak kuat-kuat. tapi sekejap lagi saya rasa macam nak menangis. hm. saya rasa macam nak lari pada seseorang, tapi dia jauh. haih. saya rindu dia, tapi entah. rasa macam jauh sangat. baik fizikal dan mental. semuanya jauh.

nampaknya, saya dah jadi perempuan jinjang -- berkongsi segala jenis perasaan secara online begini. rasa pathetic itu kembali menebal. maaf, semua ini terjadi tanpa dipaksa.

okay. no more saya. rasa macam haram jad.. haih.

kembali ke topik utama, wa nak umumkan yang wa dah deactivate fb wa. bukan sebab apa-apa. wa dah malas nak layan. wa dah tukar password, security kasi ketat, lepas tu deactivate. wuh. ini adalah salah satu perihal kes-kes fb yg wa dah malas nak layan jadi wa kasi itu happy ending sama itu fb. haha. wa betul-betul jinjang ha. wa pun terkejut kenapa wa tulis macam ni. rasa macam nak sepak pintu laju-laju. kasi terkehel kaki sebarang dua, baru lah boleh rasa macam drama, ye dak ?

haha. dah lah. wa dah malas nak pikir. sikit hari wa nak delete pulak blog ni. tapi sayang ha. banyak memori. banyak story yang bagi otak wa sedikit matang tentang hal-hal duniawi ni. semua wa simpan dalam ini blog. rasa macam orang dulu-dulu ha. haih.

dah lah sekarang sakit kepala ni boleh tahan jugak serangannya. betul-betul macam orang tua ha. sabar je la. bertubi-tubi dia nak sakit. tak kasi can wa nak rehat langsung. lahanat betul. wa betul-betul marah ni. marah sebab wa sakit. adoi.

dah. wa nak telan ubat sebijik dua.

kasi hilang ini sakit hati, eh kepala.

bai.

Perihal : Gagah.

2011-05-09T07:53:00.000-07:00

made some alteration to the layout of this blog.

duh.

purely because i have no need to reminisce about the old time.

what i have now is all good, and all in control. alhamdulillah for that.

and now i'm happy ! just realize that i haven't really update my blog with such joy mood. haha. sound a bit pathetic, but i, honestly with all my heart, thinks that the old lala is pathetic. sad, old and grumpy bitch, always bitching around whining and complaining, urgh. i feel sad. and clueless at the same time because i wonder why did i happen to be like that -___-''

we need to move on bebeh. I need to move on. whether life sucks or pathetic and sometime it just can be a pure bullshit, still, we need to move on. no more saying how pathetic i was because hey, moving on means looking forward ! no more turning back and be sad on how things are not going your way.

being strong is nothing.

being agonized and the needs to bare with the pain is.

well strong enough for me.